What about them that attract you?

What is it about the opposite gender that attracts you? For me, at first sight, without taking personality into consideration, it's got to be the eyes. The kind of eyes that once you've looked into it, you'd lost your soul forever. Hahaha, alright, that's exaggerating. It's hard to explain, it's like they are filled with mystery, one that makes you want to spend your entire life solving.

And then it'd be the smile. Many times I've seen girls who looked so ordinary until they demonstrated their captivating smile. Well, I guess that's the whole point of smiling, to steal hearts. Hahaha!

Tough week ahead! The only comforting part is that it's a 4 days work week! BKK soon, can't wait! Shall wish for a smooth week ahead before I sleep! Faan waan!

Losing sanity. Losing touch.

I finally understand why some people always have to chat on the phone or constantly text someone every night — because it's really quiet at night. When you are alone, all there is to listen to is the sound of the wind, either from your AC or fan, or maybe your own screaming thoughts.

Why don't I listen to music you may ask. To me, music is just another part of this silent. Maybe I'm just bored of all my songs... Or maybe what I seek is no mere sound of any form. It's communication.

I read somewhere that the reason for some people to always tweet / blog is because they have little friends to turn to. Made me wondered for a while and I concluded that it isn't true for my case. I just decide that I shall not bother anyone with all these insignificant thoughts of mine. Random tweets and occasion blogs will do just fine... I think... It's true that I have a small number of friends though. And decreasing as days go by.

A piece if advice for everyone who is a friend to somebody: people do get sick if you constantly reject meet up request. You may have all the valid reasons in the world. But we all know the truth — it is just that this "friendship" is of the least priority as compared to every other matters in your life. So please, if you are a friend to someone, act like it. Because I have given up, & I hope no one else will have to walk this path.

Can't wait to get married. Then I can hide somewhere on this planet with my beautiful wife. Hahaha!

Keep it real. Peace.

"Not telling you"

I want to move closer to you

I've wanted to get to know you since I met you

My heart pounds when I hear your voice

Since the day we first met, I've been absently daydreaming

As soon as I got introduced, I wanted to say hello

But as soon as I couldn't see you, my heart became mixed up

You disappeared, I’m worried to death

Will you be okay? Do you have someone to take care of you over there? I don’t know 

I nearly forgot to breath when you came close

At just your smile, my whole heart pounds

I want to tell you so you can realize the things in my heart 

But I don’t know if telling you right now would be moving too fast

I still don’t know how you feel

If I tell you those words, and your answer is no

If it’s like that, you’ll probably run away 

It’s perfectly enough already if I have you near me

I can hear your voice, I can take care of you from afar

I’ll keep my secrets in my heart

However much it gets to be, I refuse to speak them 

I want to tell you so you can understand my heart

Seriously, I want to tell you those words

But I’m so scared that I’ll be upset

If you can’t accept them, you’ll probably refuse to forgive me for those words 

It’s so frustrating, I have to keep it inside

It’s frustrating, I’m afraid that if I say it, I’m afraid I’ll be upset 

I’ll keep it away until I reveal my heart

I’ll wait for that day, the day I’ll be certain that you think I’m the one

And you’re ready to listen to the things I have inside 

I’ll tell you I love you so you can hear it closely

I’m telling you my love, do you hear me?

If it’s still not clear, you can listen to it again

Do you hear that I love you with all of my heart

- Backroom Audio

A foolish seeking game

I'm a simple person. I don't need to drive lavish cars or live in premium houses. I don't need to be so wealthy that I can travel around the world every quarter of every year just to experience the 4 seasons. 

I just need someone who I can love, and will love me in return. Someone who will count on me when she is feeling low and that I can do the same with her.

And for this "someone" that I seek, I will work to achieve the things mentioned above. All the things that I do not need, simply because she might want them. Or maybe it is these things that I do not need that will actually help me find what I'm looking for. 

Not a material girl hopefully. 

But what if she is? Well, if I really do love her, then so be it... Love is a foolish game after all. & fools, are sometime the happiest people on earth, don't you think so?

At 25

At this age, I'm starting to realise many things. Or rather my experiences in life thus far is starting to make me view life differently as compared to how I did before.

I'm starting to find girls aged 22 or below incredibly young. Feels like they haven't seen or experienced enough in life to "settle down". Oops, did I just made it sound like I'm looking to settle down already? Hahaha! I guess I'm still quite "green" myself to be even talking about experiences in life...

Materialism & cynicism are real. And we are all "tainted" by them. Shall not elaborate more on this because that's all there's to it. But I still believe in true love :D hahaha! I still believe in how 2 people, who has absolutely nothing (except for themselves) to give each other, can be together simply because of who they are underneath. & I believe I will find it someday. Okay, that was a lie. Ahahaha!

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication" they said... And I think one of the simplest & enjoyable thing to do in life is to watch HBO or other movie channels on a 55" TV with your love one in the night of a lazy weekend till the both of you doze off. Like what I've always said, it's never really about what you're doing, it's about who you're doing it with. 

Okay, having a mental block already. Been reading so much stuffs through the computer screen at work everyday that I can't stand the combination of "alphabets + numerals + computer screen". 4 days work week coming right up! Ganbatte-kudasai minna! 

Geez, what an otaku.

Living dead

When you look at a photo of someone who you used to be real close with, do you get a feeling like, "really? This person used to mean so much to me?" And then you go on, trying to recall all the adventures, conversations and little moments y'all had. But they all seem so vague... It gets me frustrated you know... And sometimes I still think about how things would've been now if everything had worked out. I guess it's normal to think about stuffs like that huh? Yeah, it probably is.

I just finished the anime Code Geass. It was awesome. Now I can't sleep because I'm sad that it'd ended. That's why I try not to start on shows. Feels so empty when they end.

Work-life balance... I wonder what's that suppose to mean. I mean... I've never had a life to begin with.

A few more quarters & we'll be there.

I love the power of words. I love how words can sometimes convey all sorts of emotions. Like words in a book, lyric of a song, motivational posters or even the now popular internet "meme-s". It's hard to describe, but you'll understand when you feel it, the moment when words bring back certain memories, make you think of something, somewhere or someone.

Alright, this is a rather random post. I'm just astonished by how fast time flew. I swear it felt like Tuesday was just yesterday.

Just a quick update on my life. Working hard on weekdays. Barely have time to hit the gym even at night. Hectic days like these make me feel like spending my weekends in a peaceful manner. Simple meet up with friends etc. But I guess ain't nobody got time for me. Sounds emo? Hahaha...

Now I'm worried that I'd be left on the shelf, when I'm old and all boney. Where are you my beautifuk girl? Maybe I've met her already, but she doesn't see me, or is unavailable. Haha... Yes, I know... Love don't come just by writing a silly blog entry on the bed. We must have the courage to pursuit it, just like everything else in this cruel world. Ok, don't know what nonsense I'm babbling. Time to sleep.