Its my life! Its now or never!

Today is a boring day. I sat in front of my computer starting from 10:45am to around 3pm chatting in mIRC. At around 3pm, I got my ass off my chair and did some workouts which lasted till 4:45pm. Then, I loaded a couple of Inuyasha movies in youtube.com and went to watch a show on channel U which starts at 5pm. After the show, I went to watch my Inuyasha Movie and then had my dinner at around 8pm. After which, I continued to sit in from of my computer and rot. I managed to play afew rounds of solitaire before I went to take a bathe. After that, the time is around 11:15pm. I managed to get into a conversation with someone in msn and then here am I writing my blog at 12:42am.

-A normal day of Geeky Toh.

Ahahahaha!!! I changed my blog skin today! Well, probably because I think my previous skin has a small window and the writings are pretty small to see, so I decided to get rid of them! Anyway, life have indeed been boring... Can't wait for school to start...

Right beside, yet a hundred miles...

"So near yet so far"... This quote is probably one of the better known ones. It can be considered as a quote can't it? Hahaha, who cares...

Final destination 3. This movie is hella gross... Gruesome scenes that I personally can't take. Its not that I'm scare or what, I just can't take gruesome sights!!! Blame it on my genes of you want to :D. Well, I'll not be a spoiler so... Catch the movie if you wanna know what I'm talking about!

Anyway, have you ever experienced walking beside somebody who you really cared for and only to feel so neglected when they slowed down just to ask another person a question that you probably know the answer? For example, you're walking beside this 'special' person and then she started slowing down and turned to your friend saying, "Hey you know Jane(Example) is having this blablablablabla" and as a matter of fact, Jane(Example) is also your friend and someone you knew! What! What! What!!! What is this!?!? Bullshit!!! Ahhh... I know... Sometimes things just can't be helped... And we may deserve it... But you know... Ssometimes your mind just blacked out! You can't think! Your guts shrink! Your heart skips another beat everytime you speak! And of course, everytime they speak... But then, even if its a sentence or maybe even a word that brings smile to their faces, everything is worth it. ( :

The Lifeless.

"I'm the king of rot! I rot at home everyday, from morning to night, 24 hours a day. I got no life! I sit in front of my computer from morning to night, 12 hours a day. I got nothing better to do! I dream everyday; day dream when I'm awake and the 'real' dream when I'm asleep. I'm the king of rot!"

That's a poem written by Kenny Toh. Wahahahaha! Oh my gaw... I'm becoming more and more lazy, more and more lame! Arghhhhhh!!! Its really very very very very boring!!! No games to play, no places to hang out and no nuts to do!!! I'm going crazy~ I wanna be your baby, cause you and me, yes we can make it~ pui pui pui! Why the heck am I typing the lyric! See I'm already mad! :D

I'm afraid... Afraid of facing something which is nothing much but a mere human being and yes, 'it' is made of fresh and blood like you and me. This being is so special that each time we meet, 'it' freezes my mind. I tried talking, but nuts came out. Actually I'm so afraid of 'it'.
Actually... I'm not really sure about what I'm afraid of... Maybe I need to lose myself ( :

What a day!

English: B4
Mathematics: B3
Science(Chemistry/Biology): B3
Humanities(Social Studies/History): A1
Pure Geography: B3
Mother Tongue: B4
Design and Technology: C6 [ This one is bullshit!]

L1R4: 14 L1R5:18

Yeah! Finally got our O levels result today! So glad that most of my friends, well almost all~, obtained cool grades!!! Well, I was pretty amazed by my result!!! Damn... I was a potential F9 maths student and I actually scored a B3! Holy crap...!!! Wahaha... Anyway, I was damn pissed with my D and T's grade... I worked so hard and only manage to score a C6!? What the fuck!? Ahahaha... Quite pleased with my results also lah... But too bad I didn't manage to win toto... Damnit!

Ahhh!!! Now I have to worry about what courses to take... Headache again... Hahahaha... Aiya, heck care! Remember? I live for the moment!!! Wahahaha... All the best people! Good night and sweet dreams! ( :

"For you I'd cross the world
For you, I'd do anything"

So sick. So sick.

叶子。

Life is just so weird... You never know if things happened out of coincidence or is it meant to be... Sometimes you'll just miss the chance that you have been waiting for without even knowing it... To me, one of the worst feeling is probably having hope, and then ripped of it. Really make one confused and close to going insane... ... Wahahahaha!!!

Anyway, life have been considerably good, but it can be better :D Wahahahaha! Pretty bored these days... Waiting for results to be released this Friday. Fear! Fear! Fear! Can you see fear in the eyes of the students who sat for O levels last year!? I don't know, but one thing for sure, you shall see none in mine for I'm the man without fear. Wahahahahaha!!! See, told you that people gets close to crazy... Ahahahaha! Arghhhhh! I'm crazy so let the whole entry be filled with madass purple! Muahahaha...

"Don't take the one you can live with, wait for the one you can't live without."

Hm.

Have you ever feel so disappointed cause you have mistrusted someone, believing everything they did is for your good? It may be a misunderstanding, but you just don't want to clear things up...

Feed my hatred; devour my heart.

"Don't believe your friends when they ask you to be honest with them. All they really want is to be maintained in the good opinion they have of themselves."

Was chatting around with my cousins the other day and he talked about his friend who like to bullshit, talk cock and talk big. I was like, "hey! Those sounded familiar!". But this friend of his is really good, he "bull-ed" about him having a Jaguar, you know those two hundred thousand plus cars, in his garage without his dad knowing it. Then I was like, "geez, when I grow up, I got to be a Scientist! There is a need for me to open a special "humanlogy" department in the Science Center where everything about why humans lie, bullshit, behaves hypocritically, etc, etc is studied!" Ha.

"Before I met her I'd be walking through life thinking I was happy, that I was complete... but now I can't go back to just being me because now I know what it's like to be whole."

Lunar New Year!

Wooooooooo!!! Firstly, I want to say that I'm hella glad that I've earned some money!!! Yeah!!! Worked as Yeo's 'ka kia' on 21st and 22nd at Woodlands, and 26th and 27th at Buki PanJang area... Lazy to describe the details... Hahaha...

Its freaking bored now that's why I decided to post some rubbish... Wahahaha... Its Chinese New Year!!! Tomorrow is gonna be a long day... But I have decided to spend some of it sleeping :D Wahaha... Anyway, Happy Lunar New Year people!!! Weee-u-weeet~~ Ahahaha ( :

"Never gone, Never far, In my heart is where you are"

Bad year for me!?

Firstly, I would like to say happy new year to everyone. Secondly, I want to say, WHAT THE FUCK! This year doesn't appear to be very bright to me... Still out of job and have been sick for the pass 6 days! Holy crap...
My throat still feels like burning coals but I think I have recovered from fever and flu already... So bored at home... The worst part is that I have no job! Damnit... Let me recover first before anything...

Progress or...?

Wahahahaha today is the day after Christmas, also named Boxing day! Ermmm... Honestly, I got no idea that such day existed until someone in irc said so... Hahaha... So... I guess its obvious enough that I don't know what does it do and what's it for... Hahaha.

Like a quote said, "Many people want to be the sun that brightens up your life, but I want to be the moon that shines on you during your darkest hours." This quote is so true... If only I have a chance to... Hahaha... Simple words like 'yes', 'no', 'don't know' may sometimes be solution or answers to doubts which caused many sleepless nights... All you need to do is to think carefully... Or rather, if you're lost, just choose the way that is the brightest to everyone, including yourself! I know... Things won't always turn out good for everyone... So, consulting a third party could be a good idea... Human beings are made selfish afterall! Remember this... Well, I'm not saying that we should always do things that reflect the positive on ourselves, just that we need see who needs the positive ray of light more...

Good night people... May the best fall upon all. ( :

Merry Christmas!

Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas! Wahahahaha!!! Silent night~ Holy night~ :D
This Christmas eve is kinda boring for me... Did nothing special, just slacked around... Hahaha. Should have at least gone down to Orchard right!? Damn! Anyway, I was pretty glad that the 848 coffee shop revived! Yeah~ hahaha.

Christmas is so beautiful! Awwwwww... Too bad something is missing... Ahahahaha!!!

Lastly,

I would like to wish everyone a Happy Merry Christmas and of course, to You! ( :

Creakkkk Kinnggg~

Wo0o0o0~ All the chalets and 'slacking sections' have ended, for now, that it ( :
Went to my family's chalet and then the... Erm... Not sure if I should call it the 2A2 2003's chalet or whatever, at Changi and Coastal Sand respectively...
Oh yeah, YouLun is back and we went to his house to stay for around 4 days and 3 nights. Haha, 1st night: Did stupid things till around 3 or 4 then went to play some stupid computer games with Andrew till 7... Pretty stupid... Hahaha... Second night: Pretty damn tired so I guess... I slept at around 11 - 12. Third night: Pretty much same as the second one. Fourth: Abit later then the previous 2.(Seems kinda lame to elaborate like this, but I'm lazy :D ahahaha.)

Chalets:

Nothing much to do actually, just chatted and crapped till the morning, played abit of cards, eat eat and drink drink ( : wahahaha... The true meaning of relaxing! Haiz... It would be perfect if there that one thing is around... Ahhhhhh! Forget that! I'm pretty much cool with it now, feeling more 'released'. But still, I CAN'T BREAK THROUGH! Wahahahaha... Christmas is round the corner... But... I'm so dead... Not sure if I'm making any progress but... I'm lost for words... Hahaha...

So bored!!! I think I'll need to go look for jobs the next week... Sooo short of cash... Well, not really that poor, just feeling kinda pissed when my $$$ falls below a certain amount :D

"Herherherherherherherherherherherherherherherherher"
Sweet dreams people.
( :

Horoscope / Dead

Horoscopes. Sometimes these readings are quite accurate... My reading for 8/12, "If you've been dreaming about change, today is the day to start making it happen." Hahahahahaha... Really wondering if I should follow this... Arghhhhh I'm going crazy!!!

Can't break through! Can't break through!! Can't break through!!! Hopes were given time and time, but smashed again and again... Why is this process continuing and never seems to stop...? I'm really getting tired of this and I believe everyone is... Too much odds. I never seems to do things the right way and forever so wussy... Hahaha... Went to Alvin's chalet at Aranda downtown on Wednesday... Hmmm, should I say its fun or... Ahahahahaha... Forget it, don't wish to talk about it... Watched "Chicken Little" this afternoon, another dreadful event, am I thinking too much or its just plain simple? Different people just have different lives... Guess my life isn't gonna be that easy after all...
I have become a totally pessimistic bastard who looks at world hopelessly and forever worrying about every shit that happened. The best part of it is that I'm freaking balless and I don't see any room for improvement.

Ever heard of the story about a girl with too much 'Curiosity' and opened a chest? She released all those 'flies' with, 'Jealousy', 'Sickness', 'Death', 'Hatred', etc, etc... Why are there only 1 fly carrying 'Hope'? If only there were more hopes, things would definitely be better for everyone... Trust, confident and courage is all that I need now... Seemed closer, yet drifting further and further away...
) :

Ahhhhhhhhh!!! Whatever~ tomorrow, is gonna be a new day! ( : maybe I should just get away for a few days or maybe weeks to cool down...

Pathetic I am!

Bad... Bad... Bad...I'm so pathetic and depressed... Haha, maybe depressed is a little too serious... I'll just use... Arghhh... I don't know. Feeling so restless since yesterday and I'm so upset with myself!!! Forever so... Hopeless. Ahahaha, I think I have become a super duper pessimistic person!!! This is booshit! I wasn't like this in the past! Some said I should just be myself... But after thinking about it, I think that's just me! Isn't I this quiet since... Think about it, how many times did I seriously started a 1 to 1 conversation? I'm usually the one who replies or just crap around in a group... I'm just this freaking weak... Arghhhhh... Nevermind, I will try harder again... Ahahaha wondered how many times I have said this and how much did I actually improved...?

Anyway, went to a job interview this morning with Alvin... The pay was really impressive... But I`ve lost the motivation to work or do whatever craps since last night ) :
Went to gym after that and was so restless that I could barley do any workouts after the first exercise... After that, we went to 761 to play basketball! Oh my god! At lest some comforting event happened ( : I met my 2 years-no-see basketball buddy! Ahahaha... Yeah he improved a lot! And I meant a lot! He couldn't do layups in the past, couldn't shoot properly and always gets the ball out when he's near the line... But look at him today! Woah... Impressive layups with tricks, handsome shooting style and dribble pass people(abit dirty though :D) Ahahahaha!!!

So hungry right now... Dinner time!

12 days left before lunnietic comes to town.

Wehehehe

Happy thoughts, Happy thoughts and a little fairy dust. These makes the formula to let you fly! Ahahaha! Well, fly as in physically(According to Petter Pan) or mentally ( : Ahahaha crap...

Something surprising happened this morning and I was... *Lost for words* Ahahahaha!!! Don't wish to go into details but... Yeah!
Arghhhh, I only managed to wake up at 11:30... That's considered freaking late for me!!! Usually wakes up at 8 - 10... Anyway, went to the gym today(Yes!!! Finally after such a long break! Ahahahaha...) Totally tired out... Did workouts from around 2:30 to 5+ shiok...! Hahahaha... Hmmm... Sat around under some blocks for a while before heading to 200+ for balling... Went to a coffee shop and slacked, then ball awhile more before heading home... Well, today is considered a much lively day compared to yesterday... Wahahaha!!! Hmmm... Wonder what's the cause... :D

Found out that I'm a rather moody person after some recent events... Little things can get me all down and I'll behave as if I'm dead... Well, little things does not refers to those normal daily life incident, examples: quarreling with someone(I don't do this! Just a example anyway), losing a basketball game or even being broke! These are nothing!!! Ahhh! Don't even know what am I trying to say. Hahaha...

1 more thing! Bon voyage to Alvin, who will be leaving for Thailand tomorrow! Hahaha... Should really sleep now... Oyasumi nasai! Tomorrow is gonna be better!

Purpose of life

Ahhhhhhh!!! Wasted the whole of today doing basically nothing! Yes! And I mean nothing! Sat in front of the PC and TV the whole day, and to make matter worst, there isn't a hell of a soul around!!!

Hmmm... After abit of thinking, I feel that life has become meaningless... Had been studying all these while for the O levels and now that its over, I live aimlessly...
There used to be a motivation to go to school- school ended and there is nothing I can do about it... There used to be a motivation to play games- What is game when there is a greater priority in life...? There used to be a motivation to earn big money- Money can't buy everything...
I always say "if only, if only, if only" and I realized that why people always say "if only I had/have" and rarely say "if only I don't have"? Maybe the problem is with myself... Yes, I'm asking for more, and will never be contented I suppose... But I don't have what it takes... Is it confidence that I lacked?

Have been trying to look for jobs... But suddenly have a feeling like, 'for what?' Money can't buy everything; opportunities that we missed, time spent unwisely or even correct our regrets. I have a feeling that I'm not ready to work... But I know I should...
Ahahahahaha, you see, this is what happens when people has nothing to do, they think too much
( : hahahaha...

I just hate winter... Rains so much... Maybe I should just hibernate through this season...


"Because of you, the rain has stopped falling"

(¯`v´¯)

The closer I get to you

Donny Hathaway & Roberta Flack

The closer I get to you, the more you make me see... Like giving me all you got, your love has captured me... Over and over again, I try to tell myself that we, could never be more then friends and all the while inside I knew it was real... The way you make me feel... Lying here next to you, time just seems to fly. Needing you more and more, let's give love a try... Sweeter than sweeter love grows, and heaven's there for those who fool the tricks of time with the hearts in love you find, true love, in a special way...
The closer I get to you, the more you make me see... Like giving me all you got, your love has captured me... Over and over again, I try to tell myself that we could never be more then friends and all the while inside I knew it was real... The way you make me feel... The closer I get to you, the more you make me see... Like giving you all I got, your love has captured me... The closer I get to you, the feeling comes over me, pulling closer, sweet as the gravity!

Getting lazier and lazier each day... How weird can human beings get... Ahahahaha... Time to sleep! The following days are gonna be a little dead :D Sweet dreams.

Prom was sick! I'm sick! :D

Prom night was sick!!! Hahahaha... Everyone was so crazy and yup, I'm sure we had fun ( : however, the food isn't that cool, and I still remember a comment made by ZiCai, 'The food is considered good for this kind of hotel lah'. Ahahahahahaha!!! I wonder is it a compliment or... Sarcasm. Hahaha... Yeah, the event was really really mad and it was so 'hot' that I nearly suffocated!! :D :D :D
Ermm... I'm not gonna elaborate the happenings later that night, or rather morning, cause ermm... Its simply indescribable :D

Ahhhhhhhh!!! I'm dying! Couldn't sleep even after staying up for more than 24 hours!!! I laid on bed for 2 hours, feeling extremely hungry, but have no appetite! Ahahahaha... Probably this, probably that~ Ahhhh, I'm mad! Hahahaha, whatever~ Time to slack/ball!!!
( :

Ended! All ended!

Everything have finally ended! School, O levels, all and all! Hmmmm... Don't really have the excited feeling though... Hahaha... It just another day~ Maybe I'll have to clear all my books and papers and blablabla to have that kind of 'Shiok ar!', 'Sibei song ar!' feelings... Ahahahahaha...

Next event will be prom night. Ahhhh... So scary... Wonder any crazy thing gonna happen that day... Oh yeah... My cousin will be leaving for America on 25th November, 6.15a.m. for holiday... Let me wish her bon voyage here ( :
Had a little change in my hair too... Arghhhhh regret cutting short! Damnit... Haha anyway, Alvin have this colour now(more or less~) And I have, this+this! Well, not 2 colors but the fusion of the 2 colors, dark red violet :D. Ahahahahaha crap.

Failed 2 jobs 'interview' so far... Finally realize how hard it is to find a job... Nevermind~ will try harder some other time... Aiya, feeling so bored right now... Nothing to do... And the weather is freaking cold~ Ahahaha... Let me go rot now... Rot... Rottttt...

Ahhhh...

Dang Dang Dang Dang Dang!!! My prelims' all messed up! Wahahahaha Got like 27 to 32 for L1R4... Hahahahaha... But I'm only worried for my maths... I believe I can do well for other subjects, but for maths, I'm SCARE!!!

Hahaha... Anyway, hmmm... Some stuffs happened lately and I was really DEPRESSED! Yes, I mean depressed! Every food I tasted seems so dull... And the weather, seemed to be contrasting with my feelings. The rain just won't stop!!! Hahaha... But the truth is out pretty soon!(Yeah, thanks to my great courage :P) Damnit! I was feeling mad and happy at the same time when I know the truth! Happy: Well, to put this in simple term, 'there is still HOPE'. Mad: Hmmm... WHAT THE HELL! I WAS ALL SAD FOR THAT 3 DAYS! DAMNIT! Hahahahaha!!!

Oh yeah, and O levels is finally coming... Can't wait for it!!! Although I know I'm not that ready, but I really wished that it will be over tomorrow... Hope that Prom night will be fun and unforgettable! (Well, unforgettable in a pleasant way~) Yeah, nothing much to do these days... Usually start my day with a maths paper, and will hang out sometimes in the afternoon or just rot all the way till night... Hahahaha... Bored. Oh 1 more thing, Bleach owns!!! Really nice anime! Waiting for the 9 pm show to start now... So bored...

Tomorrow is gonna be better! ( :

Prelims over...!

Hmmm... Time isreally flying... We're still talking about how long the prelims was and now its all over... Hahahaha. Its really freaking bored!!! No mood for studies, all my songs are 'rusty', listened to them hundred of times and... There seemed to be a barrier in my mind, blocking me time and time... Ahhhhh!!!

Hmm... 30+ days more to 'O' levels. Feeling kinda excited right now! :D But the main concentration is still the prelims results! Damn, can't wait to see how badly(or well :D), I've done. Haven't been studying hard for this exam, only reading through... But I know the things are in my head! Nothing much to talk about now... I think I'll go and take a bath and... Continue dreaming ( : Ahhhhh!!! Its still early and I'm already feeling so barking bored~ Hahahahaha...